When Your Confidence Threatens Other's...
Hello Beauties, I come to you in sheer disappointment. Sadly I'm in non-disbelief...I was visiting family this weekend and an acquaintance of a family member said something that made my skin crawl.
The woman complimented me on the weight that I have loss and made the most shallow ignorant comment "Girl you are getting close to my size, soon you will have the boy's all over you."
I was like WOW are you serious.
I did not snap on the woman nor did I let her see that I was bothered by her very shallow comment. I simply responded "Darling the boy's have always knocked on my door, I'm opening my door for men only...You can have the boy's LOL!"
You see some people believe that you have to be or obtain a certain size to be looked upon as attractive. Personally I never had a issue with knowing the beauty that I possessed I had issues with having confidence.
Some are threaten by the confidence that you possess, especially the naysayers that believe that people of plus size don't have a ounce of confidence or shouldn't have confidence.
I've heard comments such as, Your Pretty For a Big Girl. You Dress nice for a Big Girl.
I even had women ask me "How did you get that guy?" or I heard WOMEN (friends, family& acquaintances) question why would a man choose a woman of plus size..."How did she get him? She must be paying for his time etc..." I cannot begin to tell you how much it made my skin crawl to hear another woman dethrone another woman in such a shallow, ignorant, hateful way.
I detest when other's try to be endearing by saying words that they think that you want to hear regarding your size, beauty and emotions... "Even though your BIG Your still Beautiful."
HUH???Like I know this. I don't need your shallow comments darling. I never implied nor did I exude that I was insecure about my beauty.
Does my Confidence make you uncomfortable? Do you think that my Confidence is foe?
Do my Confidence threaten your shallow thoughts about me?
So what if the naysayers feel uncomfortable by us dating attractive, intelligent men. They should focus on themselves instead of YOU.
Yasss Darling you are fashionable, Trendy, intelligent, a Survivor who is Bold and Fierce! Stay Confident and allow No one to determine your level of confidence. Don't allow the naysayers to spew their hateful venom on you and have you questioning your self acceptance. Be You Darling and as I always say Make No Apologies for being YOU!!!
Friends and Family that try to be endearing with shallow baseless comments probably mean well however, you should address them immediately by telling them that you don't need their sympathy, pity- compliments or encouragement regarding your size or your self concept because you know who you are and are comfortable, fabulous and gorgeous in the skin that you reside in.
There was a time when I had the Fat Girl Syndrome and lacked confidence... however now with a revamped mentality of who I truly am and what I'm truly worth I glow in confidence.
Make No Apologies Beauties, Keep astonishing the naysayer's and Remember that Confidence is Beauty!
Visit my Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/karendharbin
Blog #SizeHealthyPlus: http://www.sizehealthyplus.blogspot.com
P.S... Be on the lookout this fall for a revised version of my book- The Fat Girl's Syndrome VS. P.H.A.T. Women Logic
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